One Heartbeat Away....

That's what they describe the Vice-President as being - the man one heartbeat away from the leadership of the Free World. The #2 guy is presumably able to take charge if some harm were to befall the President. Even the most rabid Dubya haters have to admit that Darth...er...Dick Cheney could easily take over the reins of power and knock some Third World hellholes further back into the Stone Age if need be.

Dan Quayle was the first of the Boy Veeps, but this year, phony war hero and gold-digging gay-baiter John Kerry has chosen as his sidekick a true Boy Wonder, the still damp-looking and thoroughly disingenuous Johnny "Breck Girl" Edwards". How vain is this twerp? Check out this terrifying five minutes of pretty boy narcissim as Edwards gets primped up for a trip to a McDonald's Playland in some battleground state.

SNL/Simpsons/Spinal Tap wacky guy Harry Shearer - no friend of non-liberals - has these comments about the clip:

"For a guy who's been known derisively to the Bush crowd as the Breck girl," observes Shearer, vice presidential candidate John Edwards seems "way too interested in his hair." He tries to straighten it with his fingers. A makeup technician approaches with a comb, but the senator likes it just so and does the combing himself. He signals he's ready for hair spray by closing his eyes expectantly, like a child. Then Edwards and the technician straighten a little more with their fingers. Please don't tell me that thing in his hand is a compact. Oh, dear. It is."

And this is what a guy who's probably voting for Team Feckless Crapweasel has to say!

So, when you take your Michael Moore-brainwashed husk down to the voting place to cast your 10 or 20 ballots - you are planning on participating in the Great Democratic Vote Fraud of 2004, aren't ya? - for Anbody-But-Bush, ask yourself what's gonna happen if/when Big John falls off his $8,000 bike or drowns windsurfing?

UPDATE!!! Some guys have taken a song from John Kerry's old band (he played bass - how proletarian!) in the 60's and looped it over the makeup video. It's slightly cute for a couple of minutes.