This is my favorite joke ever. If I'm in a situation where I need to tell a joke, this is my go-to bit. Enjoy.
An American, a Jew, and a Canadian are in an auto accident and die. They appear at the Pearly Gates before St. Peter, but when he checks his book, he discovers there's been an error.Try the veal! I'm here forever!
"It appears that there was a mixup and your souls were pulled from your bodies prematurely," he says, "kinda like in 'Heaven Can Wait'. Ever see that? With Warren Beatty? Nevermind."
Lowering his voice, he says, "I tell you what: Give me $200 and I'll have your souls restored to your bodies. You'll be totally unharmed and you will live your full lives. I'll toss in a little time on the end as a bonus, too. Sound like a plan?"
The American immediately whips out his credit card and badaboom badabing, he's back at the scene, good as new. However, the other two bodies remain motionless. After a while, getting worried, he calls up to the sky, "Hey! Where are my friends?"
A voice booms in reply, "We're having a snag up here. It seems the Jew is trying to talk down the price and the Canadian wants the government to pay for it.